1. Add more flesh. If u sabi me well, u go know say I slim. But I used to be fat as a child o! I no come know wetin happen

2. Publish my Magazine. Mehn! It’s long overdue fa. I’ve been working assiduously on it. In fact, I don write plenty proposals. Anyway sha, God dey. E go be.

3. Become a doctor. That title don do me strong thing for my life o! I no even mind again, anything goes. Herbal doctor, honourary doctor, medical doctor, PhD, doctor of fuji. I sha want make people call me doctor.

4. Buy a yatch and name it Margaret. Don’t ask, I won’t tell.

5. Marry Ruth if I will ever get married. Na number I wan put am, but I hide am here so those boys no go go after Ruth. Don’t tell o!

6. Build the headquarters of my company on Awolowo way, Ikeja. Tell d guys there that their days are numbered cos I dey come soon.

7. Take Ruth to ten big stores around the world to shop. She likes shopping. Mum is the word. Don’t tell anybody o!

8. Donate millions to my church. I never sabi the name yet. Don’t ask

9. Write an autobiography. The story of my life na best seller. You’ll see

10. Dem pikins dey wait for their father to fertilize the egg. I dey come. Maybe four. Shh! Don’t say it out loud.

Don’t ask why I didn’t add that I want yo be successful, dumass! Only a successful man can do all of that. *winks*